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发表于 08-7-30 16:27:35
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Hope for Getting Your Life Back
What do you think your chances are of getting better? Do you believe that there will be answers to your problems? Do you have a hopeful attitude about the future? Hopefulness can be one of the most significant influences on your progress toward recovery. People with a hopeful view about change are usually willing to try new things. But if you suffer from hopelessness, you may give up too easily or not give good ideas an opportunity to work.
Think for a moment about the effect of hope on your behavior. If you don't believe that any of your efforts are likely to make a difference, how hard will you try to change? On the other hand, would you act differently if you had faith in yourself to get beyond your difficulties, or even reach a higher plane in life? While a positive mental attitude is clearly helpful, it can be hard to come by when you are feeling down. There can be a "vicious cycle" in depression in which you lose your desire to take action. When you do less to get out of your rut, to spend time with those who love you, and to solve your problems, it is easy to become more discouraged about the future. Hopelessness feeds the depression, which slows you down even more.
The way out of depression is just the opposite. A "positive cycle" can develop when you find some reasons for hope, and either change your attitude or change your actions. After you take some positive steps, your mood lifts and your energy starts to return. You'll probably find that it's hard to make yourself feel more hopeful until you have a reason to feel that way. So you will have to take a few steps toward fixing your problems before your optimism returns.
For some people, this positive cycle keeps going even after the depression goes away because they have developed new skills, healthier habits, and better attitudes. These positive life changes help them to be stronger overall than they were before and to find greater meaning and purpose in their lives. Jeff, the teacher described earlier in this chapter, was able to lead a much more fulfilling life after he stopped comparing himself with others and began to pay full attention to family relationships and the other things that really counted for him.
We want to stop now to ask you these very important questions: What gives you hope? What keeps you going? Each of us has a unique response to these questions. But some of the common answers we have heard are: "My family, I would never want to leave them," "I know I can get better," "I really love life when I'm feeling well," "For me... I have lots of things I still want to do," "My faith keeps me going," and "I have a contribution to make in life."
Take some time now to write out answers to these two questions in your notebook. Try to think of as many reasons as you can. You can use the examples above to get you going with ideas. If you have trouble thinking of reasons for hope or what keeps you going, here are some things you can do:
Ways to Stimulate Hope for Recovery
Get started — do the problem-solving exercise outlined in this chapter.
Learn about the treatment of depression by reading this book or talking with a doctor or therapist — recognize that depression is a common illness that responds very well to therapy.
Ask someone you know well about your situation. If they are supportive and tell you that things will get better, try your best to believe them.
Remember that depression makes you focus on the negative and sometimes miss the positive. You can fight hopelessness by paying more attention to the positive things that happen in your life. These could be small things like seeing your children smile, finding a good parking space, or taking time to savor a special meal; or bigger things like completing a project, getting a raise, or making a new friend. |
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