家人和朋友对患者的帮助

精灵娃娃

最近在网上找一些药物互相影响的文章,找到一些其他的好的文章.贴上来共享.只是还是英文的,没有翻译.


Family and Friends' Guide to Recovery From Depression and Bipolar Disorder

When a friend or family member has an episode of depression or bipolar disorder (manic depression), you might be unsure about what you can do to help.  You might wonder how you should treat the person.  You may be hesitant to talk about the person’s illness, or feel guilty, angry, or confused.  All of these things are normal.

When a friend or family member has an episode of depression or bipolar disorder (manic depression), you might be unsure about what you can do to help.  You might wonder how you should treat the person.  You may be hesitant to talk about the person’s illness, or feel guilty, angry, or confused.  All of these things are normal.

There are ways you can help friends or family members throughout their recovery while empowering them to make their own choices.


The Five Stages of Recovery

It can be helpful to view recovery as a process with five stages.  People go through these stages at different speeds.  Recovery from an illness like depression or bipolar disorder, like the illness itself, has ups and downs.  Friends and family who are supportive and dependable can make a big difference in a person’s ability to cope within each of these stages.

1. Handling the Impact of the Illness
Being overwhelmed and confused by the illness.
An episode of mania or depression, especially one that causes major problems with relationships, money, employment or other areas of life, can be devastating for everyone involved. A person who needs to be hospitalized may leave the hospital feeling confused, ashamed, overwhelmed, and usure about what to do next.

What friends and family can do:

Offer emotional support and understanding.
Help with health care and other responsibilities.
Offer to help them talk with of rind health care providers.
Keep brief notes of symptoms, treatment, progress, side effects and setbacks in a journal or personal calendar.
Be patient and accepting.

Your loved one’s illness is not your fault or theirs.  It is a real illness that can be successfully treated.  Resist the urge to try to fix everything all at once.  Be supportive, but now that your loved one is ultimately responsible for his or her own treatment and lifestyle choices.


2.Feeling like Life is Limited
Believing life will never be the same.

At this stage, people take a hard look at the ways their illness has affected their lives.  They may not believe their lives can ever change or improve.  It is important that friends, families, and health care providers instill hope and rebuild a positive self-image.

What friends and family can do:

Believe in the person’s ability to get well.
Tell them they have the ability to get well with time and patience.  Instill hope by focusing on their strengths.
Work to separate the symptoms of the illness from the person’s true personality.  Help the person rebuild a positive self-image.
Recognize when your loved one is having symptoms and realize that communication may be more difficult during these times.  Know that symptoms such as social withdrawal come from the illness and are probably not a reaction to you.
Do your best not to rush, pressure, hover or nag.
A mood disorder affects a person’s attitude and beliefs.  Hopelessness, lack of interest, anger, anxiety, and impatience can all be symptoms of the illness.  Treatment helps people recognize and work to correct these types of distorted thoughts and feelings.  Your support and acceptance are essential during this stage.



3. Realizing and Believing Change is Possible
Questioning the disabling power of the illness and believing life can be different.

Hope is a powerful motivator in recovery.  Plans, goals, and belief in a better future can motivate people to work on day-to-day wellness.  At this stage people begin to believe that life can be better and change is possible.

What friends and family can do:

Empower your loved on to participate in wellness by taking small steps toward a healthier lifestyle.  This may include:
Sticking with the same sleep and wake times
Consistently getting good nutrition
Doing some sort of physical activity or exercise
Avoiding alcohol and substances
Finding a DBSA support group
Keeping health care appointments and staying with treatment
Offer reassurance that the future can and will be different and better.  Remind them they have the power to change.
Help them identify things they want to change and things they want to accomplish.

Symptoms of depression and bipolar disorder may cause a hopeless, “what’s the point?” attitude.  This is also a symptom of the illness.  With treatment, people can and will improve.  To help loved ones move forward in recovery, help them identify negative things they are dissatisfied with and want to change, or positive things they would like to do.  Help them work toward achieving these things.



4. Commitment to Change
Exploring possibilities and challenging the disabling power of the illness.


Depression and bipolar disorder are powerful illnesses, but they do not have to keep people from living fulfilling lives.  At this stage, people experience a change in attitude.  They become more aware of the possibilities in their lives and the choices that are open to them.  They work to avoid feeling held back or defined by their illness.  They actively work on the strategies they have identified to keep themselves well.  It is helpful to focus on their strengths and the skills, resources and support they need.


What friends and family can do:

Help people identify:
Things they enjoy or feel passionate about
Ways they can bring those things into their lives
Things they are dissatisfied with and want to change
Ways they can change those things
Skills, strengths and ideas that can help them reach their goals.
Resources that can help build additional skills
Help them figure out what keeps them well.
Encourage and support their efforts.

The key is to take small steps. Many small steps will add up to big positive changes.  Find small ways for them to get involved in things they care about. These can be activities they enjoy, or things they want to change, in their own lives or in the world.



5. Actions for Change
Moving beyond the disabling power of the illness.

At this stage, people turn words into actions by taking steps toward their goals.  For some people, this may mean seeking full-time, part-time or volunteer work, for others it may mean changing a living situation or working in mental health advocacy.


What friends and family can do:

Help your friends or family members to use the strengths and skills they have.
Keep their expectations reachable and realistic without holding them back.
Help them find additional resources and supports to help them reach their goals step-by-step.
Continue to support them as they set new goals and focus on life beyond their illness.
Help them identify and overcome negative or defeatist thinking.
Encourage them to take it easy on themselves and enjoy the journey.
People with depression or bipolar disorder have the power to create the lives they want for themselves.  When they look beyond their illness, the possibilities are limitless.

What you can say that helps:

You are not alone in this.  I’m here for you.
I understand you have a real illness and that’s what causes these thoughts and feelings.
You many not believe it now, but the way you’re feeling will change.
I may not be able to understand exactly how you feel but I care about you and want to help.
When you want to give up, tell yourself you will old of for just one more day, hour, minute whatever you can manage.
You are important to me.  Your life is important to me.
Tell me what I can do now to help you.
I am here for you.  We will get through this together.

Avoid saying:

It’s all in your head.
We all go through times like this.
You’ll be fine.  Stop worrying.
Look on the bright side.
You have so much to live for why do you want to die?
I can’t do anything about your situation.
Just snap out of it.
Stop acting crazy.
What’s wrong with you?
Shouldn’t you be better by now?

malnu

单双相抑郁亲友指南

当你的亲友受单、双相抑郁（后者又称躁郁症）之累时，你或许不知如何才能帮助他们。你或许不知如何对待病人。你也许不敢谈论病人的病情，或内疚、或困惑。所有这些都是正常的。

在你的亲人、朋友康复的全过程中，你都有办法帮助他们，并帮助他们恢复自主做出决定的能力。

康复的五个阶段

可以把康复的过程看成五个阶段来看。人们经历这些阶段的速度是不同的。从单、双相抑郁中康复的过程同这些病症一样，是会有起伏的。家人和朋友的支持和依靠对于病人应对这些阶段是可以起到非同寻常的作用的。

1.应对疾病的影响
因疾病而落魄、困惑。

罹患躁狂或抑郁，特别是造成重大人际关系、金钱、工作或其他生活问题的病情，对每个人来说都是毁灭性的打击。本该住院的病人也许会困惑、羞愧、落魄地离开医院，对未来根本毫无着落。

亲友可以做的有：

提供情感支持与理解。
帮助照顾他们的健康和其他方面问题。
主动帮助他们与健康护理人员交流或帮他们找到这样的人。
对症状、治疗、进展、副作用和复发等状况简略地记录在日志或日历中。
耐心并接受他们。

你所爱的人患病不是你的错，也不是他们的错。这是一种真实的疾病，是可以成功治愈的。不要急于求成，希望一步到位地解决。要支持他们，但当下要由你所爱的人自己为他/她的治疗和生活方式的选择负担最终的责任。

2. 感觉生活有限
相信生活不会永远如此。

在这一阶段，人们以悲观的眼光看待疾病对生活的影响。他们可能不相信他们的生活会有所改变，甚至改善。亲友和护理人员要对他们灌输生活的希望，并帮助他们重建积极的自我形象。

亲友可以做的有：

相信病人能够好起来。
告诉他们，只要有时间和耐心，他们能够好起来。要从他们的力量入手，灌输希望。
把疾病的症状同病人的人格区分开来。帮助病人重建积极的自我形象。
意识到什么时候病人发生了症状，并意识到这种情况下会更难与他们沟通。要知道像避开人际交往这种事往往是疾病导致的，而不是针对你个人的。
尽量不要催促、施压、犹豫或喋喋不休地报怨。
情绪障碍会影响人的态度与信仰。绝望、无兴趣、愤怒、焦虑、不耐烦等都可能是疾病症状。治疗会帮助病人认知症状并努力改正这些扭曲的想法和感觉。你的支持与接受在这一阶段至关重要。

3. 意识到并相信改变是可能的

质疑疾病的束缚并相信生活可以不同。

对未来的希望会有力地推动康复过程。计划、目标和对未来幸福的信仰可以激励人们保持日常的安康。在这阶段，病人开始相信生活可以改善，改变是可能的。

亲友可以做的有：

帮助病人通过一些小措施逐渐向更健康的生活方式调整，包括：
保持固定的作息时间
不断获取充足的营养
做些体力活动或锻炼
避免酗酒和其他物质滥用
加入就近的DBSA（编辑该材料的抑郁与双相支持联盟）
保持固定的健康护理，坚持治疗
宽慰病人，让他们了解未来会是也将是与现在不同的，更好的。提醒他们他们有催成这种变化的能力。
帮助他们找到他们希望改变的东西和希望实现的目标。

抑郁症或双相会导致一种绝望、“无所谓”的态度。

这也是疾病的症状。经治疗病人可以并一定会改善。帮助至爱的人在康复的道路上前进，帮助他们认清他们不满的、希望改变的消极事物或他们愿意做的积极事物。帮助他们努力实现积极的目标。

4. 改变的承诺

探索改变的可能，挑战疾病的束缚。

抑郁和双相都是很强烈的病症，但他们并不一定会阻碍人们过上充实满足的生活。这一阶段，病人在态度上经历了变化。他们更加意识到生活中的各种可能性和他们面对的不同选择。他们努力避免被疾病阻碍或限制的感觉。他们积极地执行他们认定的保持健康的方略。要注重他们的长处、技巧、所需的资源，并支持他们的需要。

亲友可以做的有：

帮助病人确定：
他们有哪喜欢或有热情的事物
如何把这些事物融入他们的生活
他们不满意而且希望改变的事物
如何改变这些事物
帮助他们实现这些目标的技术、力量和想法
可以帮助培养其他技巧的资源
帮助他们想出保持健康的办法
鼓励并支持他们的努力。

关键是不要想一口吃个胖子。许多小的步骤汇聚在一起会产生巨大的积极变化。帮助他们想些小办法参与他们在意的事情。这些事情可以是他们喜欢的活动，也可以是他们希望改变的事物，可以是他们自己生活中的，也可以是外在世界的。

5.改变的行动

冲破疾病的束缚。

在此阶段，人们把言语转化为行动，开始向目标进发。对于一部分人来说，可以找些专职的、或兼职的、或志愿的工作，而对其他人来说，可以是改变自己的生活状况，或进行心理健康宣传。

亲友可以做的有：

帮助病人使用他们的力量和技巧。
对病人的期望要切合实际、能够实现而且不会令他望而生畏。
一步步帮助他们找到实现目标需要的其他资源。
在他们制定新的生活目标，准备疾病后的生活时继续支持他们。
帮助他们认清并克服消极的悲观的思维。
鼓励他们平和对待自己，享受生命的过程。
患有抑郁和双相的人有能力创造他们希望的生活。当他们把眼光放到他们的疾病之外时，他们的希望是无穷的。

这些话可以用来安慰他：

你并不是孤单的。我在这里陪你。
我理解你这真的是一种病，正是因为这个病才会产生那些想法和感觉。
你现在可能不相信，但你的感觉会转变的。
我也许不能准确地理解你的感受，但我关心你，希望帮助你。
当你想放弃时，告诉自己：只要能坚持，就再坚持一天、一小时甚至一分钟。
你对我很重要。你的生命对我很重要。

不要说这类话：

都是你自己胡思乱想出来的。
我们都有过这种事。
你会没事的。别烦了。
往好了想。
你有这么多牵挂为什么要死呢？
对你的情况我是无能为力了。
振作起来就得了。
别疯了。
你什么毛病？
你到现在还不应该好起来吗？

malnu

已将本贴推荐至此贴线下http://www.sunofus.org/bbs/viewt ... =page%3D1#pid124100再次感谢精灵娃娃及时提供好文。

哲人

亲人骂你跟你做对怎么办？

malnu

站长已将本贴引入阳光首页http://www.sunofus.org/main/article.php/1041。但英文中尚有几处拼写问题，列举如下，凑齐了给站长。

第一段重复二遍，应删除段一。

When a friend ...

When a friend ...

第一个阶段中亲友应做的事中有一句：

Offer to help them talk with of rind health care providers.

应改为Offer to help them talk with or find health care providers.

好像还有，也许是另一贴子里的，先找这些吧。

精灵娃娃

被所爱的人误解,是我抑郁的时候最大的噩梦.
缓和了以后,能正常上学的时候，某一天凌晨,我做梦.梦到被家人误解的场景,在梦里哭醒,心里仍深有余悸.
  
自月,你说的没有错,"向家长根本连电脑都没摸过，书也不去查,确实病人看来就是漠不关心了",
但是很多时候，我们可以去影响他们.影响不了的人,我们可以选择不让他们来伤害自己.

对于象你姐姐这样关心你理解你的人,你可以好好去争取他们更多的支持.这样的支持是需要学习的.在抑郁的人身边的人，需要足够的勇气和信心,宽容和理解,以及很多的技巧.